Game Show Review – Winsanity

I love general knowledge-based game shows. But what I especially love are game shows where the questions are too difficult/obscure to feasibly know, and you have to use logical reasoning and deduction to estimate an answer.

So I’m enjoying the new GSN show Winsanity. The premise of the show is that contestants will get a list of ten descriptions of numbers, and have to put them in numerical order. The questions will be things like “Weight of the Titanic in pounds,” or “Number of eggs that IHOP uses in a year,” or “Number of active Girl Scouts in the US,” or “Lifetime posts on Kendall Jenner’s Instagram account.”

Obviously you aren’t going to know these facts off the top of your head. So you have to think about them, come up with a basis for approximating them, and figure out how to rank them. And I find that really interesting and fun to play along at home.

The downside of the show is that there is way too much filler padding out the episodes. There’s all this nonsense about people in the audience having light up bracelets, and randomly sharing prizes with the contestants, and blah blah blah… I’m getting bored just writing about it. They only get through one board of ten questions in a half hour show, when they could easily get through four boards if they cut out all the crap. So the show is only watchable if you DVR it and fast-forward through the lame pointless boring stuff.

But I find the questions interesting enough that it’s well worth the six to eight minutes it takes to watch an episode when I skip past the garbage time, and I would definitely recommend it.

GAME OF THRONES SPOILERS – A Yelp Review of Winterfell Kennels

Game of Thrones Spoilers if you haven’t seen Season 6 Episode 9 below.

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Random text to keep spoilers from showing up in previews:

It is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire. During the battle, Rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire’s ultimate weapon, the DEATH STAR, an armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet.

Pursued by the Empire’s sinister agents, Princess Leia races home aboard her starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save her people and restore freedom to the galaxy…

Okay, here are the spoilers:

A Yelp review of Winterfell Kennels

By Huge Black Dog

I’ve been a fan of the Winterfell Kennels since I was a puppy. I think they serve the best human south of The Wall. So I was quite concerned to hear that Chef Ramsay had been replaced.

Still, I wanted to give Chef Sansa a chance, and I’m glad I did! I came hungry, and was excited to see my food already prepared for me. There was no chasing down my food like I sometimes had to do with Ramsay’s dishes.

Chef Sansa had prepared a delectable Tied Up Man’s Bloody Face. Let me tell you, I’ve always dreamed of the Face Buffet at the House of Black and White, but I’ve never been able to make it to Braavos. It was amazing to be able to eat face here in Winterfell!

It smelled scrumptious. I took one lick, and I was in love. It was as if she had taken the essence of Chef Ramsay and distilled it into this one wonderful dish. Then the food tried to give me commands, which made it even better! Let me tell you, there’s nothing better than chowing into food that thinks it’s your master! It was still screaming as I ate its face. Even better, the face had been pre-tenderized for me.

In her first try, Chef Sansa managed to top Chef Ramsay’s signature dish, Live Fat Woman With Newborn Baby. This was the best human I’ve ever tasted!

I considered taking a star off for the long wait, but the food was so good that I couldn’t bring myself to do so.

Five stars, must try!

[Someone has asked a question about this review]

That does sound delicious! Can you tell me if the faces are filleted like they are at the House of Black and White?

A Bear

[Huge Black Dog has responded to this question]

No, the face was still attached to the skull. However, some of the bones were pre-broken. Personally, I like a bit of crunch when I’m eating faces.

Huge Black Dog

[A bear has responded]

The crunch is nice, but if you’ve never had a face fillet, you’re missing out. You have to try the House of Black and White some time.

A Bear

[Huge Black Dog has responded]

I’d love to, but it’s difficult for me to book passage to Braavos, because I’m a dog.

Huge Black Dog

Broadway gets more ridiculous than Hollywood – Monopoly: The Musical

Recently my wife and I fast-forwarded through the Tony awards to watch the musical numbers that we found entertaining. After we finished, my wife asked me, “If I had told you a few years ago that a hip-hop musical about Alexander Hamilton would dominate Broadway, would you have believed me?”

I said that I would, because Broadway has churned out so many musicals based on crazy ideas that I’ve ceased being surprised by them. In recent years we’ve seen hit musicals based on Mormons preaching sci-fi tropes to starving Africans, a coal miner obsessed with ballet, a Monty Python movie, making a hero out of the murderous dog-killing psychopathic top-five most hated movie villain of all time, an obscure crappy Mel Brooks movie about a bad play about Nazis, lecherous puppets, and a baby monster that grows up to be a big monster and wants to murder his uncle so he can become a dictator.

I claimed that nothing Broadway did would surprise me. If the smash hit musical of 2018 that has a six-month waiting list for $1,000 tickets turns out to be an opera/honky-tonk mash-up about a duck that plays the tuba, I wouldn’t be remotely surprised.

Apparently the universe heard my claim that nothing Broadway could do would surprise me and said, “CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!” Because they’re making a musical about Monopoly.

I’ll say that again. They’re making a freaking musical about Monopoly. That lame boring board game you got sick of when you were ten. Somehow there will be a musical about it.

I can’t even offer any commentary or joke that is more insightful or snarky than saying that they’re making a musical about Monopoly.

They’re making a musical about Monopoly.

Follow up note: There’s also a Spongebob Squarepants musical.